And then it struck me as I lolled delightfully in my comfy little bed, that our lives are really like a boat.

They are geared naturally to take us somewhere, but unless we jump on board and set sail to harbours new, we are not going to go anywhere.

And whilst it is nice to watch your little boat sitting comfortably by the shoreline, you simply can not maximise it’s output or use it to it’s full extent, if you never actually get in it and take it for a spin in the surrounding waters.

And thus is your life.Your life is just like this little boat.

Sure it is nice and safe sitting idly by the shore’s edge, tied to the dock – but is it really fulfilling its true potential?

The answer is of course not.

You have to actively get into your life  - your little boat – and steer it to where you wish to go.

Around corners, out into deep waters, back into the shallows, out for a spot of fishing, a day out on the lake with friends, or a few hours practicing your artful manouvering to capitalise on all the boat has to offer.

This is the only way to evaluate the potential of your little boat – your life – what it is capable of and where it can take you.

You can theorise all you want, about it’s possibilities, it’s ability to float and navigate deep waters and bring joy to your life – but nothing will ever beat practical application and a hands on approach.

Life is no different.

I can certainly say from personal experience of my own little boat that I have:

* left the shore without adequate supplies and developed extreme hunger

* chosen the wrong trip for a boat my size

* upgraded to a ship too early and been out of my depth

* lost my proverbial oars into the ocean

*taken on water and and capsized

* misjudged the current capacities of the aforementioned boat and got into real trouble

* lost a few friends overboard

*navigated myself into treacherous waters which proved rather scary

But I have equally

*found the where-with-all to get out of some sticky situations

* had some marvellous afternoons quietly rocking on the water’s surface with a delightful lilt and sense of pure joy and satisfaction

* experienced some fantastic fishing trips

* learned to sail in all sized boats

* navigated my way to some pretty exotic, adventurous and fun places that only my little boat could take me

So you can see that you have to experience life personally to learn from its challenges and hone your life skills.

You have to take your boat out onto the water – and no-one else can do it for you.

Each little capsize is a lesson well learned, and a mistake – or rather misstep, that you will not make again. But if you little boat was left by the shore, you would be no better sailor and navigator today than you were a year ago, or ten years ago for that matter.

Capsizing is the sign of a life well spent.

A sign of lessons well learned.

A sign of knowledge that has been harvested and stored away for when it is needed.

So with each faltering expedition out onto the ocean in your little boat, be proud and courageous and learned. For you have succeeded in facing your fears, charting new territories and learning the inevitable lessons that come your way.

And for those seafarers amongst you, who are used to sailing out of the safe harbour, you will know the tremendous satisfaction that comes from both success and failure alike.

Success – a testament to a lesson well learned

Failure – strangely also a success, as it pin points and directs you effortlessly to the next challenge to be tackled. The next lesson to be learned and problem to be conquered.

So – you see it is a WIN WIN SITUATION.

Who knew?

We have been led to believe in this crazy world in which we live, that success is success and failure is failure.

Well nothing could be further from the truth.

Success sometimes comes with few lessons at all – so is it really success if gotten with no real knowledge and progress?

And failure? Failure can be a road to success with understanding and depth…….perhaps masking the real benefit of it’s experience.

For without initial failures and problems, you would have no appreciation of all you have achieved and even less understanding of how all the pieces in the puzzle fit together.

Failure brings with it invaluable knowledge to store for future use.

Success brings with it confidence to continue on and cast your boat a little further out into untested territories.

Both serve an invaluable purpose.

But neither can exist, if you do not jump enthusiastically into your little boat and steer it away from the safe harbour and into a brave new world.

You have been given this little boat – but only you can climb aboard and sail away into the possibility and adventures that await you.

So – for the next few days, I invite you to examine your little boat and if it is not already in the water and packed with supplies to go somewhere you have always wanted to go, I suggest you get prepared and plan to sail away for a little trip.

Choose your trip and companions wisely.

Choose the supplies you will need.

Let someone know where you are going so you have backup should you need it

Choose the waters into which you will sail and set your departure time…….

And then GO GO GO!

SAIL AWAY and live your life.

Get in that boat.

Chart your course.

Take the chance and set your aim.

You may just discover how invigorating it is to be a willing and pro-active participant in your own life.

The captain of your own ship. A seafarer extraordinaire. An adventurer of the high seas. A fisherman on a quiet lake.

The Master of your own Destiny!

#Discover You. #Love You. #Be You

Christine

“If you want to lead a happy life –tie it to a goal. Not to people or things ” – Albert Einstein

For me there are two elements to the message of this quote. The first being that if you tie your sense of joy and self worth to a goal – you are in control. You can control your steps towards this goal.You can decide to change course and reach for a different goal at any time. You are in the proverbial driver’s seat and so you are not likely to come unstuck by the opinions and criticisms of others.

You are the captain of your own ship – setting course and sailing towards the destination of your choice.

Should you decide to tie your happiness to other people, you will be forever trying to please them. Forever trying to fit into their idea of what is good, what is worthwhile and what you should be doing with your life – and as you will all know – this approach is doomed to failure and little joy will be found there.

When tying your happiness to a goal – remember too that it is not the achievement of the goal necessarily that will be bringing you the joy. It may just be the working towards the goal. As once one particular goal is achieved we tend, as humans, to set ourselves another goal post to reach.

It is a continuing cycle.

It is a circle that never ends.

It is our constant source of fulfilment – the setting of and working towards various goals.

Reach one – work towards the next.

Decide its no longer for you – change direction.

Struggle with the process, keep on trying, and finally make it to where you have been aiming.

Whatever the situation – the process of having the goal and working towards it, is what will bring you the joy you seek in life.

And what are these lofty ambitions I am encouraging in you?

They can be the smallest, most trivial thing or the grandest scheme and notion you can come up with. The size of the goal is not important. It is the feeling you get as you work towards it that counts.

Perhaps you try a new recipe, you have always been wanting to try.

Perhaps you learn a new language.

Perhaps you set up a charity to raise money for a cause dear to your heart.

Perhaps you determine to finally get healthy, lose some weight and adopt a more active lifestyle.

Perhaps you book a cruise and travel the world.

Perhaps you decide to write a blog, or a book, or a movie script

Perhaps you begin a daily meditation practice

Perhaps you volunteer to assist the homeless or elderly in your area

Perhaps you learn to sing.

Perhaps you take that investors course you have always been interested in.

Perhaps you decide you are going to shower your new baby with love each and every day and be the best mother you can be.

Perhaps you are determined to make a co-worker feel good that day and have planned a series of compliments to give them a boost.

Perhaps you are planning to buy groceries for your elderly neighbour.

The list is endless – and there is no right or wrong.

The goal can be long term or short term.

The happiness and joy comes from simply following your heart, taking action and tying your joy to the actual movement towards the goal – rather than other people’s attitudes to that goal and your pursuit of it.

Which brings me to the second part of this puzzle.

I believe that our sense of happiness and joy rest in two places: our sense of self worth and our sense of contributing to something. And having a goal and tying our happiness to it, is a sure fire way to feel content. To feel worthwhile and purposeful.

Why?

Because – you are in control.

Because  - you can control your work towards the goal

Because – you are in the driver’s seat

Because  - you are contributing to a bigger picture.

Because – you have a reason to be where you are.

Let me be clear though.

You must avoid being attached to the outcome – it is the process, that should be your driving force. The feeling you have as you reach for the goal and follow the path – not the perceived riches or accolades that lie at the end of the journey – but the journey itself, that will bring this happiness.

For as I said – as one mountain is conquered, we set ourselves another to climb. That is the nature of life and what brings joy and happiness. The understanding of this fundamental principal may pay great dividends.

A sense of purpose

A reason to get up in the morning

A path to follow and goal to reach

It is the goal and pursuit of it, that can bring the joy you seek.

But tying your joy and happiness to people is a dangerous thing to do.

Why?

You can not control other people

You can not guarantee their interest in your set of goals

You can not control or guarantee their reaction – or lack of it – to what you do

You can not control their attitude to you and your goals or the contribution they make to your life.

You can not expect them to be as invested in your life, set of goals and dreams as you are.

Only you can be 100% excited, motivated and driven by your life.

Everyone else is too wrapped up in their own.

It is simply not reasonable, to expect everyone else’s lives to be about you and your goals too.

And you simply can not rely on others to set the tone for your existence.

You set the tone for your existence.

You decide your worth on the Planet.

You decide what is important to you and how you are going to get there.

You and only you are the Master of Your Destiny.

Everyone is out there chasing down their own specific goals, and what is of value to you may not be of value to someone else – and expecting them to support all your ideas is simply not fair or reasonable.

We all need to be free to pursue our own particular goals.

Now – if other people around you intersect with you here and join you on your path – great.

But often times you may find that many people really close to you, in fact, do not share your views  and goals.

That is OK.

As I have written before both support and criticism from others ,are crucial in helping you determine what it is, that you do want.  And help you determine exactly what goals are important to you. So take on board both, set your course and then sail off in the direction of your dreams.

Claim your goals.

Claim your life.

Claim your right to be you………and tie your happiness to your goals and the process of attaining these – not to the people around you, their opinions, or the rewards you perceive that may come from attaining your goal.

So simple.

So perfect.

So easy.

Just do your thing, have a reason to get out of bed every morning and happiness can be yours.

And on that note I shall sign off for today.

Discover You. Love You. Be You.

- Christine -

What if we could choose a different way?

What if the societal constructs that run much of the world could be rear ended and  new models and expectations built in their place?

What if there was so much more?

What if women could be seen in other ways – past their role as appendages to men,  sexual objects for the gratification of men and nurturers to all?

What if it was once a different way?

What if?

And this brings me to a wonderful book by Shirley MacLaine, that certainly poses a lot of interesting questions. The book is entitled simply: WHAT IF…

Today I would just like to share with you the final few paragraphs on Page 52

How you react to these words is fodder for your own consideration and I will not be giving my opinions here, as I feel the value in this small excerpt, as it rests in the context of this page of writing, is for you to examine your own personal response to the words.

No doubt your marital status and experience thereof will impact upon your mulling over of these words.

I found them quite thought provoking and as you can tell from my introduction they set me off on quite a few tangents of enquiry. My hope is that these word take you to your own place of self reflection and self discovery-  untainted by my own personal journey through these words.

So now – over to the incredible Shirley MacLaine:

“ After my husband and I split, I made it a point to dodge the marriage bullet. From then on, I had loving sex without commitment. I loved to work hard, and feel I have earned all I have, which is enough for the rest of my life. But mostly I am content. Content with my surroundings, my friends, my family (whom I see when I want to), and my life.

Many women friends of my age are finding exquisite happiness on their own. None of us feels alone. On the contrary, we feel free and creative to be who we are. We often have celebratory lunches (too hard to find a parking place at dinner), reveling in our freedom of aloneness.

Wake Up, women of the world! You have earned the right to be free of taking care of others. Perhaps it isn’t even your nature. Perhaps you are the true warriors of peace.”

As is always the case when I present someone else’s words for reflection, I invite you to go back and read the passage a few more times.

Let it sit with you.

Let it quietly roll about in your mind and consciousness.

Let it guide you to where you need to be – for You.

Discover You.

Love You.

Be You.

- Christine -

-       Unknown –

All the quotes in my blog have had a powerful impact upon my own life, which is why I share them here with all of you today. And this particular quote is one of the most poignant. Sure, we have all had moments that we wish had played out differently. Things we have said. Actions we have taken. Moments that highlight our imperfections and inadequacies, rather than our strengths and our virtues.

But that is ok.

That is just how life is.

It is often these “less than ideal” situations or moments that push us to define what we truly want from ourselves. It is these moments that push us to discover exactly who we are – the light and the dark. The good and the bad. The wise and the not so wise. It is these very moments that create our identity, sense of purpose and sense of who we are. What we can do better. What we want to achieve. Where we want to head. So in my mind, we should be as grateful for these moments as we are for the ones that go swimmingly well and leave us basking in the fabulousness of who we are.

Along with this has also come the realization, that most moments that linger with me as “ gee – I wish I could do that again” – tend to be the moments I missed.

The opportunities that I didn’t capitalize upon.

The moments that came and went.

The experiences that passed me by as I either sat in indecision, or fear, or some other form of immobilization that stopped me from participating.

Some of these things were really simple things like not going abseiling because I thought my bottom would look big as I came down the side of the cliff. How ridiculous. How sad. How completely stupid. I hasten to add that years later I did have the opportunity to go Indoor Rock-climbing and this time no such worry stood in my way and I had a fabulous time.

The message here is quite simple – loud and clear.

Go out on that limb. Follow the path to new experiences.

Dare to try.

Dare to be different.

Dare to give it a go.

Why?

Because quite simply, the opportunity may not come your way again. You may miss the chance to meet some interesting people or do something new and worthwhile.

Of course – there are opportunities that present themselves daily that may represent a most unwise choice that could seriously harm yourself or the people around you and of course these are not the opportunities to which I am referring here. Anything that represents a clear and present danger to you or those around you should be avoided and declined at all costs.

What we are talking about here, are the things we let slip by that could take us on a new course, with no real danger to life and or limb. Things that float past our reality, beckoning us forth to a new adventure. Things that are on our “bucket list” perhaps but never quite happen. Things that we always dreamed of doing.

It is funny but true, that we will most likely be disappointed by the chances we didn’t take than by the ones we did. At least when you follow through on an idea, a wish, a dream, a plan – you know the results of your efforts.

But if that dream, that vision, that idea, that plan, that promise, that invitation is left unanswered – then you will never and can never know what might have been.

Would have  – could have – should have – are the most destructive and fruitless words in our vocabulary. They take you on a very short ride to nowhere.

Been there and done that are far more satisfying, even if the doing of the action cements firmly in your person that you have no intention of ever taking that course od action again. This could be said for my decision to go whale watching one wintery Sydney day. It was flat out the worst 3 hours of my life. The seas were incredibly rough and there was not a whale in sight. In fact, the only creature that made a brief appearance was a random seagull that happened past for but a moment.

To add salt to my wounds, whilst I was being violently ill over the side of the boat, making my reacquaintance with the bacon and egg roll I unwisely chose for breakfast, a Canadian couple were canoodling madly nearby. The scene was quite surreal. My sister and I beyond ill at one end of the boat whilst the Canadian Bear Grylls and his girlfriend were having a “love in” at the other ha ha ha.

Now – the point is. At least I went on that whale watching trip.

Would I do it again? Certainly not. But I am not sitting around wondering what it would have been like had I gone.

I have also been offered the opportunity to go sky diving  – twice no less.

However this is something that I have never done. And I must admit that I do sometimes sit around thinking what it would be like to jump put of a plane into oblivion at thousands of feet above land ha ha ha. So I do wonder if that is one thing I shall be disappointed in, within myself as I head to great beyond at the end of my life on the Planet.

As I said – we all have to way up in life what represents fair risk in our lives. And I am not suggesting you all run out and do crazy, risk taking activities, like sky diving or whale watching ha ha ha. I am simply recommending that you take life by the proverbial horns and get out there amongst it.

There is no longer the excuse of not having anyone to do things with, as there are oodles of social groups through which you can meet likeminded individuals and join up with them to try out some new things. Meet Up is a wonderful way to find kindred spirits of all kinds. They have groups for dancing, attending music, concerts and bands, discussing literature, watching films and documentaries that can change the world, dinner groups, drinking groups, non drinking but still having fun groups, hiking and bush walking groups, scientific groups, philosophical groups, foreign language groups etc etc . This list goes on and on -  so you can always jump on line and find some other people to enjoy some new things with you.

At the end of the day:

Only you know what is on your “bucket list “ .

Only you know what dreams live within your heart.

Only you know what opportunities you have let pass you by in the past

And only you can make a change into the future to seek, explore and discover all that you are, all that you want to do, all that you want to learn, all that you want to be and all that you want to experience.

So – make time each day to think about you. Make time each day to honour you and your dreams, your ambitions and your wishes.

Make that “bucket list” and start ticking off the items.

Make a decision to take opportunities as they come your way.

Get out and about and do some of those things you have always dreamed of doing, as one day, your time will be up.

So now – go back to the quote at the top and re-read it.

Then slowly close your eyes, listen to your heart and see what comes to your mind.

Imagine yourself dreaming, exploring and discovering.

Where is your little boat taking you?

To where are you sailing?

What adventures are you embarking upon?

What opportunities  and invitations will you not miss again?

Let your soul speak to you about what is lying dormant inside you waiting to be awoken.

Now – go – reread the quote again and I shall wait for you here. Do not open your eyes again until your heart is full of joy, full of ideas, full of excitement and full of possibilities.

Welcome back.

Now grab and pen and paper and write down exactly where you saw yourself.

Where was your soul drawing you to be?

What opportunities, activities and experiences have your name etched upon them?

Where are your sails taking you?

I can say that doing this little exercise and reading this little quote once a week or once a month can inject some purpose and drive into your life. Re-evaluate where you are at all the time, as we constantly change our minds and ideas and feelings – and that is OK too. That is simply growth.

So take the plunge and launch yourself headlong into life.

Organize those ukulele lessons. Book that trip to Machu Picchu. Catch up with that long lost friend for dinner. Accept the invitation to that seminar. Go out salsa dancing even though you are 70 and people say you are too old. Start that new cupcake business. Go hiking with a new group of like- minded people.

Just do it!

Like diving into a sea of possibility – if you don’t go in the water, you can’t experience the sweet caress of the waves or the sand beneath your feet.

As we all know. Life rewards action.

This is your time.

This is your moment.

This is your chance to move.

Discover. Love. Be.

This is all there is.

- Christine -

Not one other.

There is no one else who is 100% You.

I mean – how cool is that!?

What it really means is that no matter what you do in life, no matter what choices you make, no matter which path you take – you can not fail at being You.

It is simply impossible.

Nobody can be “Youer” than You!

When you think about it, that is pretty crazy stuff. In fact, it is so crazy, and wonderful that I wonder why we all take life so seriously.

I mean, how simple can it be?

All we have to do in life is be who we are, with the added bonus that there is actually no-one else in the race ha ah ah ha!

There is only one of us at the starting line.

Kaboom!

Everyone’s a Winner!

You would think that given this knowledge we would all be running around the place with huge grins on our faces. But no – quite to the contrary, we seem determined to make life so much more difficult than it is meant to be.

The main culprit here is constantly comparing ourselves to others. Pushing away all the unique traits and attributes that make us who we are, in favour of “towing the line” and fitting in with some pre-ordained notion of how we should be.

And whilst I may sound like I have my own unique little life perfectly in balance, I have spent much of my time in the past doing exactly this and creating a whole world of pain and anguish for myself that just did not need to be there.

In retrospect it all seems so foolish. Because it is ha ha ha!

We are here on the planet, I believe, to simply figure out who we are and express it joyfully to the world at large, giving them the opportunity to either join in our celebration or run to the nearest hiding place.

Either option is fine as long as we are being true to ourselves and not impinging upon anybody else’s right to be who they are in the process.

True to You.

Loving You.

Unashamedly You.

That is all You need to do.

So why is it all so difficult sometimes?

Because we live in a world that is constantly trying to convince us that our little brand of who we are – that is, your little brand of You – doesn’t cut the mustard. That we don’t measure up.

Measure up to what I ask?

I prefer chutney to be honest.

Who set these standards and conformities?

How about just measuring up to your own set of rules, morals, ethics and standards?

Like I said. As long as you are not wilfully and deliberately impacting upon another person’s life and liberty in a negative way, you should be free to live your own life and run your own race.

And the benefits are huge.

So consider this.

If you can stop listening to the Peanut Gallery……. who always have an opinion on everything and a seemingly unending bucket of nuts.

You can Find you.

You can Be you.

You can Run Your own race.

And guess what?

The bonus is that you are a dead set certainty to win this race, as you are the only one in it!!!

Can you believe how easy life is meant to be.

Job Done.

Happy Days.

And with that knowledge, I ask you to go full throttle into life.

Discover you.

Love You.

Be You.

Live Your life.

Because there is only one You.

-Christine-

For most of us, especially those approaching their 40’s and beyond, there will be segments of our lives, each one dotted with the friends and acquaintances particular to that period. And then, in the most special and extraordinary of instances, there are those gem like friendships that stand the test of time and remain constant, resistant to the challenges of travel, distance, family, changing life paths and other such occurrences.

Quite recently I found myself taking stock of all the incredible and amazing people who have passed through my life, both recently, and way back into my school days. And I have to say – what a ride I have had. The person who exists today, this Christine Denny as she exists right here and now, is not only down to me – but also down to this vast myriad of people who have come in and out of the revolving door of my life experience.

I like to think of my life as some sort of Grand Hotel, so to speak, with a great set of fabulous rotating doors, leading into the lobby. You now the ones – all brass and glass and usually swinging about quite swiftly ha ah ha! Some people think the entry point looks way too complicated and precarious to negotiate, so simply walk on by, not even bothering to investigate what is on offer, and risk getting snaffled in the swiftly moving doors. Some get into the revolving door, take a peek into the lobby, go around a few times to make certain, then decide to just keep on spinning around and exit straight out the other side ha ha. Some get into the revolving door, exit into the lobby, stay a while, have a few cocktails or a delightful afternoon tea and then leave. And others move from the lobby up into one of the designer penthouse suites and take up residence for the long haul.

What is incredibly interesting to me is that some of the people I was sure would be in the penthouse for quite a while, sipping on a margarita and admiring the view. People I would grow old with. People whose friendships I was certain would last the distance.  People whose company and ideas I treasured the most. Some of these people are actually the people who have checked out of my hotel prematurely and unexpectedly. These valued and treasured parts of my life, were simply one day no longer there.

No longer available.

Clearly they no longer found me of interest, value or worth in their lives?

Clearly they had moved on to what they perceived as “bigger and better” things and people?

Clearly that meant that I was defective in some sort of way?

Having been put out with the garbage, so to speak, is not a nice feeling at all.

Clearly this sort of thing packs a real punch – and we have all experienced it.

We are left exclaiming the proverbial – “ what the? “ as we make the jump to the realization that we shall have to negotiate the rest of our life without this well weathered and trusted friend. We are left asking a whole host of questions about what we did wrong. What we said wrong.

What the hell happened?

What I have finally realized is that, not all our friendships are meant to last a lifetime.

Not everyone who comes into our life is meant to stay.

I did nothing wrong.

You did nothing wrong.

We were just meant to have these people in our lives for a shorter period of time then we anticipated.

We learned our lessons from them.

We grew and blossomed and found out important stuff about ourselves through them and their contribution to our lives.

Maybe we didn’t blossom so much on the surface and the end of the friendship was upsetting or disturbing or abusive. But if we look inward and look to the deeper elements of the friendship, we will see that we grew with this person – and they grew with us. We shared ourselves and our lessons with each other. Grabbing a nightcap in our lobby or chatting over a coffee in the café, we experienced each other and all we had to offer each other. And now – it is time to grow in another direction, with other friendships activating our tools of self -discovery.

Everyone has their very own Grand Hotel that they are running and servicing and sometimes, you just can not be a long-term guest in their hotel. Perhaps they do not have enough rooms available, as new guests have booked in?  Perhaps the guest in Suite 404 is giving them a lot of trouble, requires greater attention and you are the inevitable fall out? Perhaps they recently closed their hotel and are re-opening in a new location? Perhaps their hotel is under renovation and there is simply no room for the old furniture? Perhaps you have new requirements as a guest – you want Mexican food for dinner each night, but their restaurant only serves Thai? You want a turn down service but they do not have the capacity to offer such things?

It has taken me so long to see, that my friendships are not all about me.

It has taken me so long to see that there are many variables in sustaining a friendship or relationship of any sort and these variables exist on both sides.

In both hotels.

In both people’s lives.

Not just in my Grand Establishment.

The simple and sometimes cruel reality is that friendship is a two way street.

You can not force someone to want to be your friend.

You can not force someone to want to spend time with you.

You can not run the race of friendship on your own.

It takes two.

But here is where the magic and mystery lies.

If you look closely into those lost friendships, you will see that in 99% of the cases, when one friendship exited stage left so to speak, another friendship would have entered stage right. Most of the times, as one person leaves the lobby of your life, another person will come through the back door and decide to stay a while, order and beverage and take off their coat.

So do not despair, the next time a friendship or relationship ends. Trust in the process of life and know that someone else will be entering your life soon to take you to new experiences and new times. Someone else will enter to fill the gap. You can trust in that for sure.

Be vigilant as these new people and experiences come into view though, as if you are too busy wallowing in the loss of what and who went before, you may miss the new people and opportunities that are presenting themselves. Also be cognizant of the fact that the new person coming into your life could be you.  That’s right. The irrepressible and wonderful you, could be needing a little alone time to work on a new project or to simply be –taking stock of the journey so far and where to set off to next.

So relax.

Follow your heart.

Trust that a new horizon awaits you and take the necessary steps to get there.

Some of the most important friendships along my life path have been those that no longer exist, or those that are only nourished sporadically.

So instead of mourning the loss of a friendship – celebrate what is gave you. Celebrate what it taught you. Rejoice in the good fortune you had in meeting that person and spending time with them, safe in the knowledge that a new and exciting adventure is just outside your door, waiting to enter, when the vacancy sign is visible from the path.

So hang out the shingle to your Hotel. Let it be a Grand Hotel of your making.

But remember, that some of these guests will come and go at will, through your revolving door, and this is exactly as it should be.

Discover.

Love.

Be.

- Christine -

Imagine a woman who trusts and respects herself. A woman who listens to her needs and desires. Who meets them with tenderness and grace.

Imagine a woman who acknowledges the pasts’s influence on the present. A woman who has walked through her past. Who has healed in the present.

Imagine a woman who authors her own life. A woman who exerts, initiates, and moves on her own behalf. Who refuses to surrender except to her own truest self and wisest voice.

Imagine a woman who names her own gods. A woman who imagines the divine in her image and likeness. Who designs a personal spirituality to inform her daily life.

Imagine a woman in love with her own body. A woman who believes her body is enough, just as it is. Who celebrates its rhythms and cycles as an exquisite resource.

Imagine a woman who honours the body of the Goddess in her changing body. A woman who celebrates the accumulation of her years and her wisdom. Who refuses to use her life-energy disguising the changes in her body and life.

Imagine a woman who values the women in her life. A woman who sits in circles of women. Who is reminded of the truth about herself when she forgets.

Imagine yourself as this woman.

Patricia Lynn Reilly

Taken from the book: The Strength of Women

There really is not very much I can add to the profound wisdom of this passage and I thank Patricia Lynn Reilly from the depths of my being for writing it. It is funny how certain words find you at the perfect place and time and give you exactly what you need in that moment.

I happened upon the little book that contained this writing, one sunny day in a Post Office queue in Mackay, North Queensland. I have a tendency to shop in Post Offices and Airports, so it was not surprising that my eye wandered whilst waiting in the Xmas throngs. But what was surprising was that it was a book of this nature that caught my eye. It was unusual that this little book took my attention for some reason.

I was not there to buy a book.

I was not needing to read a book.

I just saw the book and felt immediately drawn to it.

For most of my life I have lived with a certain amount of annoyance at having been born a girl. In a world that is so heavily weighted towards men, it just seemed like an uphill battle sometimes. Apart from having to deal with a whole list if issues that come with the simple reproductive capacity we bring to the world, it just seemed like men had all the fun. Made the rules. Called the shots. Had less to worry about.

Then one summer’s day – I found this book and read this insightful passage and the world of my womanhood opened up like a brand new book, waiting to be explored and read for the first time.

The impact each verse had on me was quite overwhelming.

For the first time in my life I felt like part of an incredible Sisterhood!

Part of a wise council of elders.

Part of an incredible group, blessed with the role of giving life to the planet.

Part of a special force for good.

Part of a sensual, beautiful, loving and nurturing energy.

I actually felt glad to have been born a woman.

This was a huge leap for me, and one that has been gradually unfolding over the past few years. Whereas in my younger years I always preferred the company of men, I found myself meeting more and more incredible women.

Strong women.

Inspiring women.

Fun women.

Really funky, and cool women.

Headstrong, and opinionated women.

Compassionate women.

Women who set their own course and knew their own value.

Women who stood their ground and made their own way in the world.

Sexy, smart, empowered women who supported the other women around them.

And the oh so very wise women who took me under their wing and guided me to pastures new.

It is interesting to me that I chose two very male dominated professions on which to build my earlier life: tap dancing and drumming. Perhaps there is something in that? Perhaps I set myself a struggle that I need not have had?  But like all things in life, perhaps it was these very experiences that have informed who I am now and guided me to the work that I now find so enjoyable and empowering?

Who knows?

Time will tell?

But what I do know – in this moment – is that the passage above in pure gold!

It will no doubt mean different things to different people – and that is the beauty of the written word. It can be digested and reviewed in any number of ways subject to the readers experience and expectations.

So I invite you to go back

Sit quietly.

Read it again.

Take from this wisdom whatever it is that feeds your soul in this moment.

Revel in being a woman.

Revel in the women around you.

Find strength and courage and heart and fire in the sensuality and assuredness that is your right as a woman on the planet.

Discover You.

Love You.

Be every inch of the Woman that is You.

- Christine -

Sometimes it just seems easier to whinge and wallow. But is this really helping the situation? Perhaps not?

The molehill does not always have to turn into a mountain.

Infact – nothing in insurmountable. Nothing is a problem. Just a different pathway to where you are going. A little less comfortable perhaps. A less familiar path. But why not just “live on the edge “ a little?

Be happy to explore new things. New possibilities. Not for any reason – just because you can. So your life has gone a little off course. Perhaps it was meant to – and when you look back and see the bigger picture you will be happy that you turned off the road when you did.

Perhaps the reward is in the doing. Perhaps the reward will be in the trusting.

Just because.

At these times of challenge, stay alert to all the goodness in the world. Switch off to the negative, because you just do not need it.

Glow. Glitter. Radiate your knowing and trust, that everything will be OK out into the Universe.

Be open to the possibilities.

What possibilities?

Do not bother yourself with such details all the time – as when the time is right all will be revealed to you. When the time is right the possibility will arrive at your doorstep in a blaze of glory, like a knight in shining armour, beckoning you forth to a brand new space, a brand new day, a brand new you and will provide you with all the guidance you need to embrace this new time, this new experience, this new moment.

You just need to trust and to surrender to it.

Contemplation can be a wonderful thing – but nothing beats just getting out there and doing it. But don’t get ahead of yourself and bog yourself down with superfluous questions. They will bog you down like quicksand.

Rise above your questions and let the reality of existence show you in real terms the path that is yours. Be true and honest and nothing can stand in your way.

Light the path.

Water the seed.

Follow the yellow brick road.

Know that if you are doing something, that it is your Destiny and You are learning something invaluable from it.

Learn the Lesson.

Embrace the Light.

Love the Process.

Look for no reward.

The reward is the process.

Try the new and the unexpected.

Dare to fail.

Dare to not care what others think.

Dare to simply be.

No reasons. No excuses. No explanations. No need.

Just Be.

This is the key to a joyful experience on the planet. A place that abounds with exotic, wild, joyous, intoxicating and humbling experiences.

So next time your world seems to not be going to plan, take a step back. Take a deep breath and trust that all will be OK. Be open to other possibilities that you may not have considered before. Take action to rectify the situation – but remain open and flexible to things you may not have considered before.

I am sure we can all agree that hindsight is a wonderful thing. So think back to another occasion in your life when everything went “pear shaped” but yet years on you realized that it was the best thing that could ever have happened to you. This is so very often the case and we can sometimes look back and think “ I can’t believe how upset I was over that when in fact it turned out to be he best thing that ever happened to me”.

I can think of at least four occasions in my own life, when I felt truly devastated by the turn of events in my life, but then years later I thanked my lucky stars that the apparent misfortune befell me. It is incredible how so often the best of Good Fortune comes to us masquerading as Sad and Sorry Days of Grief and Woe.

So – keep a level head and a clear mind. For as sure as the nights are long – the next day will turn up and life will go on no matter what your attitude to it. So you might as well, employ an element of trust that all will work out for the best and step into each day with hope, positivity and possibility.

And that is the key.

So many people simply do not allow for the possibility of things going well.

They do not allow for the possibility of a negative situation turning into a positive one.

They do not expect anything good to come from a perceived “bad” situation.

As I have said in previous posts. You can only manifest in your life what you can conceive of. So conceive that this dastardly occurrence in your life may actually have some lesson, positive outcome or tipping point that is going to change your life or impact your life in a meaningful and or positive way.

If you want possibility to exist in your life than you have to open the door to it and beckon it in.

Like anyone or anything, if you slam the door in the face of possibility all the time it will stop coming to call and the doorbell will remain un-rung.

So next time there is chaos in your life take a different stance.

Look for the lesson.

Choose the best path available.

Be open to possibilities that you may not even have considered and trust that the best option will be made clear to you.

Discover. Love. Be. Trust.

-Christine-

Blame the past.

Worry about the past.

Wish to change the past.

But let’s face it. The simple fact is that there has never been a more futile endeavor than sitting about contemplating our past failings…..or successes for that matter.

We live in the now.

We live in the present.

And the only thing we can really control is how we choose to act in the here and now.

If there is one thing I am striving to delete from my experience at this present time, it is regret.

It is the most futile of emotions.

The most futile of places to be.

The most ridiculous waste of time, when all is said and done.

As the great saying goes:

“What’s done is done and can not be undone”

So all we can do is focus 100% on the present.

Create actions and thoughts in this present moment, that can take us through to the next moment in a positive and empowered way. Positive actions today can certainly become the positive habits of tomorrow – all you need to do is let go of the past and swing full throttle into the present.

I must confess that I used to be very much a “regret laden” individual. This is a fact that any of my family members will attest to. Constantly asking –

“ But what if I had done that?”

“ Did I miss my opportunity by not taking that job?”

“ Should I have accepted that offer or that project?”

“ My life could have been so much different if only blah blah blah”

Well you know what!

You didn’t. And it is not. And it won’t be.

I am sure you all know someone who suffers from this condition.

This What if, If only, It should’ve been this way disease.

And it is painful to listen to in the extreme. I know because I had to listen to myself for a good number of years ha ha ha ha!

But enough is enough – I can’t go on  – I can’t go on – no more! [cue song and dancing girls]

I certainly do not have the answers to all of life’s big questions, but I do know this.

Spending your time basking in the unanswerable and unquantifiable world of “what if” is a sure way to nowhere but misery with a capitol M!

So – if this is you. Stand up right now. Look in a mirror and say simply:

“Enough is enough. You didn’t. You’re not. It’s not. It won’t be. You aren’t”

Now wave Bye Bye to that whinging, complaining slave to the past…… and be free!

Too easy!

That is it! Simple!

Decide right here and right now to move forward. To be present.

Now go forth and create a new reality, based on what you can actively do today to get where you want to be – today.

Start where you are now. Right now. And just build on it one little step at a time each and every day.

You might be surprised at just where you end up. But you have to start from where you are now, without regrets and without looking back at every missed opportunity, or misread adventure in a negative light.

We all have them.

Things that we perceive as mistakes.

Mis-steps.

Mis-haps.

Mis-adventures.

Missed opportunities.

Mis-calculations.

But perhaps – just perhaps – all these so – called unfortunate, regrettable incidents in our lives are the ones that we have learned the most from. Perhaps many of these things are what have brought us to where we are today. Perhaps these are the things that have forged understanding and compassion within our souls. Perhaps they are things that we actually really enjoyed, if we were honest with ourselves. Perhaps these “regrets” are what build our character and inform our mission and purpose in life, as we go forward. Perhaps they should be relished, cherished and used, as a force for good in our lives -their work already accomplished and done in the past.

We are after all, the sum of all we have experienced. And every moment of our lives has brought us to where we are today! Every moment whether perceived as good or bad, right or wrong, positive or negative has brought us to where we stand right now at this very minute. And perhaps we need to simply trust the process. Trust a higher order of things.

Perhaps regret really stands for:

Really

Easy

Growth

Reserved

Especially for

Today

Like I said earlier. Regret as we know and perceive of it, is a wasted emotion.

A road to nowhere.

An empty boat.

So the choice is yours.

Either move forward and give regret the flick. Or move to a place where your perception of it takes on a more positive and helpful connotation.

- Christine -

As with most things in life – less is more – and I found this brief and succinct verse to be most profound and touching in its simplicity and connection to the truth of our reality.

I invite you to claim your space for the next few minutes, settle in and read the verse below. Read it with intent. Read it with purpose. Read it without the need to rush onto and into the next activity of your day. Allow it settle within you and around you. Allow it to wrap you up like a huge blanket and give you permission to get to know you.

To find you.

To be you.

To honour you.

THE VOICE 

There is a voice inside of you

That whispers all day long

“I feel that this is right for me,

I know that this is wrong.”

No teacher, preacher, parent, friend

Or wise man can decide

What’s right for you – just listen to

The voice that speaks inside 

By Shel Silverstein

Now – I ask you to just sit once more with those words. Let them fill you up to the brim – overflowing with support and acknowledgement of who you really are.

Let them pour into every crevice of your being.

Let them flow into the very ends of your fingertips and down into the soles of your feet.

Let the words penetrate your mind, expand your heart and pour into your ears.

And now – read them once more.

Feel the clarity moving through every inch of your body.

Feel the energy starting to move.

Allow the thoughts, feelings and passions that represent your true self to surface and make their presence felt within you.

Acknowledge what matters to you.

Let those thoughts, those wants and those desires poke their heads up and get your attention.

Take 10 – 15 minutes to sit quietly with this verse and your thoughts and just observe what comes to your mind. See what rises to the surface, bubbling up to greet your new awareness of what lies within. What desires and passions have been lying dormant within you – waiting to be invited to the surface?

What thoughts flashed through your mind as you read the verse?

What longings did you feel in your heart?

Now – read it again. And again. Really let it float about within you and resonate.

Now – close your eyes and sit with it for another 10 minutes or so.

Okay – open your eyes.

Are you surprised by what thoughts came to you during that process?

Sometimes it is so difficult to clarify exactly what it is that we want in life, but the truth is that our most desired self is right there within us. Like a little gift- wrapped present just waiting to be opened.

But we can not open a gift if we refuse to see it waiting for us on the table.

And it is the all consuming fear of other people’s expectations, or society’s expectations or our parent’s expectations that can cut us off from this voice within and leave us feeling directionless. Empty. Lost. Hopeless.

Like a boat without a rudder.

A person without a purpose.

There is nothing worse than feeling that you can not live your life in line with your own values and beliefs. And it is these values, thoughts, beliefs, passions and interests that lie within our soul waiting to guide us to a life of purpose and contentment.

They are all a gift – a treasure – just waiting to be found and opened.

The truth is that we all know where our heart lies, if we are honest with ourselves.

We all know the topics that light a fire within and call us to action.

It may be scaling Mount Everest.

It may be baking cookies for your friends.

It may be setting up a new business.

It may be writing a book.

It may be finding bargains online and sharing them with others.

It may be spending time with family.

It may be working as an activist or advocate for an issue close to your heart.

It may be lying in the sun drinking cocktails.

It doesn’t matter what it is  – it just matters that you connect with your inner voice and acknowledge its guidance.

I believe with 100% conviction, that much of the disharmony in the world today is caused by people not being allowed to live their lives in line with that “little voice within”. There are so many people who feel “bullied” into living someone else’s life.

Living a life to someone else’s standards and ideals.

The life of an accountant may not be at all compelling or rewarding for someone who desires from their heart and soul and their little voice within to be an artist.

The life of a dancer may not be at all compelling or rewarding for someone who desires from their heart and soul and their little voice within to be a stockbroker.

The life of a Corporate CEO may not be at all compelling or rewarding for someone who desires from their heart and soul and their little voice within to be a social advocate for political change.

The life of an entrepreneur may not be at all compelling or rewarding for someone who desires from their heart and soul and their little voice within to have a regular job with regular benefits they can count on and little responsibility.

The key here is that what is right for one person may not be right for another and our happiness and contentment, rest in the acknowledgment of this fact and in our ability to recognize and utilize this Voice within.

This wonderful barometer of our soul.

This wonderful call to action.

This wonderful resonance that stamps our individuality and our true calling across our entire being and existence, with the ability to bring us a sense of peace and fulfilment regardless of our exterior world.

The irony of life on the Planet Earth, as we know it, is that despite having this wonderful tool as close to us as it could possibly get – right there within us – few people are actually aware of it and even fewer use it to facilitate the life they have always dreamed of.

But the key to this door can be found in the profound words of the little poem presented to you today. Once again I invite you to unlock the door and walk through to a new and exciting existence where you honour the truth of who you are.

Not your parent’s truth. Not your teacher’s truth. Not your friend’s truth. Not your preacher’s truth. Not your mentor’s truth. Not my truth.

Your truth.

There is a voice inside of you

That whispers all day long

“I feel that this is right for me,

I know that this is wrong.”

No teacher, preacher, parent, friend

Or wise man can decide

What’s right for you – just listen to

The voice that speaks inside

Thank you once more Shel Siverstein.

Discover You. Love You. Be You.

It really is that simple.

- Christine -