Let’s make compassion the new fashion.

Having been back in work mode for a week or so now, it struck me as I lay awake in bed this morning, pondering life, that compassion may be just the key we all need to make real strides in our lives as we head into 2015 and beyond.

And I am not talking only about compassion towards others……….. but also about compassion towards oneself. Cutting ourselves a little slack now and then too. Fully accepting and understanding that we are doing the best we can – and that is it. End of story.

No ifs.

No buts.

No what ifs.

We are all giving it a red hot go –  and that is all we can ask of ourselves.

So often, we seem to really give ourselves a hard time, when we fall below the expectations we may have set ourselves. Perhaps it is really disappointing to not have reached a certain goal. And perhaps we feel deflated when something does not turn out as planned. But the old adage ” Live and Learn” is certainly something to take on board in these situations.

Learn the lesson.

Redirect your efforts.

Show yourself a little compassion and move forward.

And this compassion is the key, I believe to a content and happy existence. An existence where you are not constantly in a state of angst and worry, but rather in a state of acceptance and compassion for the human being that you are and the journey you are on.

Because for all intents and purposes your life is destined to be full of these moments.

Moments you would rather forget.

Moments in which you wish you had made a different choice.

Moments you wish you could rewind and replay.

So instead of dressing these moments in angst, anger, embarrassment and pain, simply take them, flood them with compassion and watch them transmute into episodes of total love for yourself, the learnings your received and the imperfect person that you are.

In case no-one else has ever told you this:

You are not perfect – and you never will be. But you are beautiful and perfect just as you are.

And that is the irony of our existence.

So rock out that compassion for yourself and give yourself a chance to shine and love and live and be.

Forget about the time you did this or that –  and focus on all the good you bring to the world.

And if you would like to bring more good to your surroundings then start a plan, write a list and get going. The only time that exists is the present – so live in that moment,  in the here and now, where you can effect change and enjoy your being.

To get started write a list of the 10 things you like best about yourself. There are sure to be oodles more than 10, but that is a good, humble start ha ha ha. You may write:

1. I have a great smile

2. I make a great bacon and eggs

3. I have raised 3 really lovely children

4. I am kind to people and help my neighbours

5. I am a great swimmer

6. I am pretty clever when it comes to business strategizing

7. I am an inspiring teacher/lecturer/musician/dancer/actor/lawyer etc

8. I am a lover of food and show great appreciation for other people’s cooking

9. I am a great football / tennis /hockey /polo /darts / pool player etc

10. I am really good at enjoying life and making other people feel happy when they are around me

Kaboom – done.

Appreciating all your positive aspects, can be a really great way to start this focus on compassion for self –  and you may soon find yourself writing 100′s of  things you like about yourself.

But for some reason we are conditioned in life to focus on the things we do not like or readily accept about ourselves.As opposed to either choosing to change these aspects and move in another direction or simply accept them as part of us and shower ourselves with this compassion and acceptance, we somehow tend to focus on these perceived negativities and beat ourselves up about them.

So we could also do with realising that it is when we falter and fall that the most magic happens. When the real learnings occur and I  had a recent Facebook post that is quite relevant here, so I will share that with you now too:

If you have fallen down and are feeling low or worried or irritated or scared or disappointed or sad- turn the situation around and remember that the golden moments in life are anchored at the bottom of your life experience. In the moments when you fall. Look for that golden nugget of knowledge, figure out what you can take from the experience, what little gem is there for your benefit? What is hidden in the dirt where you fell?Then pack this little gem in your little bag of tricks, pick yourself up, dust yourself off and launch yourself firmly back onto the road of life. Trust that your fall is actually a gift in disguise. Take the gift, treasure it forever and break free to discover the new you! Climb that next mountain and enjoy the ride! But remember – you will fall again! Because that’s where the good stuff is waiting to be revealed! That is where the magic happens!

So we need to recognise the gold that can be found in these moments of frustration and use them to our advantage.

You are gorgeous just as you are.

You are beautiful.

You are a wonderful person with much to offer the world.

So bring out the compassion for You and watch it trickle into every aspect of your life and sense of self –  and then watch it flood into the way you have relationships with the people and the world around you.

It all starts from within.

It all starts at the heart of you.

It all begins with this compassion for your own journey.

#DiscoverYou, #LoveYou, #BeYou

Christine