Regrets, recriminations and rebuilding. Are you a slave to your past – or trailblazing a future to last?

There are so many times when we seem to live in the past.

Blame the past.

Worry about the past.

Wish to change the past.

But let’s face it. The simple fact is that there has never been a more futile endeavor than sitting about contemplating our past failings…..or successes for that matter.

We live in the now.

We live in the present.

And the only thing we can really control is how we choose to act in the here and now.

If there is one thing I am striving to delete from my experience at this present time, it is regret.

It is the most futile of emotions.

The most futile of places to be.

The most ridiculous waste of time, when all is said and done.

As the great saying goes:

“What’s done is done and can not be undone”

So all we can do is focus 100% on the present.

Create actions and thoughts in this present moment, that can take us through to the next moment in a positive and empowered way. Positive actions today can certainly become the positive habits of tomorrow – all you need to do is let go of the past and swing full throttle into the present.

I must confess that I used to be very much a “regret laden” individual. This is a fact that any of my family members will attest to. Constantly asking –

“ But what if I had done that?”

“ Did I miss my opportunity by not taking that job?”

“ Should I have accepted that offer or that project?”

“ My life could have been so much different if only blah blah blah”

Well you know what!

You didn’t. And it is not. And it won’t be.

I am sure you all know someone who suffers from this condition.

This What if, If only, It should’ve been this way disease.

And it is painful to listen to in the extreme. I know because I had to listen to myself for a good number of years ha ha ha ha!

But enough is enough – I can’t go on  – I can’t go on – no more! [cue song and dancing girls]

I certainly do not have the answers to all of life’s big questions, but I do know this.

Spending your time basking in the unanswerable and unquantifiable world of “what if” is a sure way to nowhere but misery with a capitol M!

So – if this is you. Stand up right now. Look in a mirror and say simply:

“Enough is enough. You didn’t. You’re not. It’s not. It won’t be. You aren’t”

Now wave Bye Bye to that whinging, complaining slave to the past…… and be free!

Too easy!

That is it! Simple!

Decide right here and right now to move forward. To be present.

Now go forth and create a new reality, based on what you can actively do today to get where you want to be – today.

Start where you are now. Right now. And just build on it one little step at a time each and every day.

You might be surprised at just where you end up. But you have to start from where you are now, without regrets and without looking back at every missed opportunity, or misread adventure in a negative light.

We all have them.

Things that we perceive as mistakes.

Mis-steps.

Mis-haps.

Mis-adventures.

Missed opportunities.

Mis-calculations.

But perhaps – just perhaps – all these so – called unfortunate, regrettable incidents in our lives are the ones that we have learned the most from. Perhaps many of these things are what have brought us to where we are today. Perhaps these are the things that have forged understanding and compassion within our souls. Perhaps they are things that we actually really enjoyed, if we were honest with ourselves. Perhaps these “regrets” are what build our character and inform our mission and purpose in life, as we go forward. Perhaps they should be relished, cherished and used, as a force for good in our lives -their work already accomplished and done in the past.

We are after all, the sum of all we have experienced. And every moment of our lives has brought us to where we are today! Every moment whether perceived as good or bad, right or wrong, positive or negative has brought us to where we stand right now at this very minute. And perhaps we need to simply trust the process. Trust a higher order of things.

Perhaps regret really stands for:

Really

Easy

Growth

Reserved

Especially for

Today

Like I said earlier. Regret as we know and perceive of it, is a wasted emotion.

A road to nowhere.

An empty boat.

So the choice is yours.

Either move forward and give regret the flick. Or move to a place where your perception of it takes on a more positive and helpful connotation.

- Christine -